Do you ever feel powerless? Well, I do! As I am writing this article, I am sitting in complete darkness in my tiny apartment with the only beam of light coming from my laptop. Yes, power outages are becoming all too common around where I live, and let’s just say that it’s the only thing in my life that has some sort of consistency (consistent disappointment). Living alone is bad enough; living alone in the dark is a whole different ball game. But I’m not here to complain about power or why solar panels are too damn expensive because that’s a story for another day. I’m here to talk about why, regardless of your “power situation,” living alone isn’t as fancy as society may have you believe.
For as long as I could remember, I have always fantasized about the idea of living alone. Maybe I’ve watched too many Hollywood movies growing up, which had me convinced that there isn’t anything cooler than being the captain of your own ship, and if we are being honest, that’s very much true! I mean, you can wake up at 3:00 AM in the dead of the night, pop open a bottle of wine, and stare out the window because you feel like it. If that’s not the ultimate form of freedom, I don’t know what is. However, as exciting as it may seem, there were a few things I wish I was better prepared for.
1. Beyond the Rent
A while back, when I first began living alone, I used to think that my only major expenses for the month were rent and food, but that couldn’t be farther from the truth. It turns out your monthly unlimited internet, which doesn’t work half the time, your cleaning supplies, which basically consume themselves, the ride service you call whenever you’re late somewhere, and your recreational expenses when you decide to go out once in a lifetime, will quickly pile up on you like dirty laundry. And that’s not all—if you have a psycho landlord like mine, he may ask for money weeks before your payment is due because he sees you as a money machine. Don’t get me wrong, because I’m not saying money is everything, but it’s right up there with oxygen.
2. Alone Doesn’t Mean Lonely, or Does It?
One of the first things you will realize once you start living alone is that you will have a lot of quiet time. This is going to feel great at first because you can actually hear yourself think. Another often understated benefit is, of course, the fact that you can walk around the house naked or have solo dance parties without feeling like a maniac (it’s your house, after all). I also found that late nights with a nice cup of tea and a good book could make you forget whatever you’ve endured that day. However, as great as it is to live a quiet life, there will be days where the silence will be too loud to bear; days where you actually don’t want to give your thoughts a lot of air time; days where that nice cup of tea doesn’t taste the same. There will be days where, instead of solitude, you crave companionship.
3. Learn to Cook or Die Trying
We have now come to my favorite subject: FOOD! It’s my favorite subject because I like to eat, not because I’m a good cook (that’s a nice way of saying that I am a DISASTER in the kitchen). I personally view cooking as an extreme sport because whenever I cook, there is always a very good chance that I could burn the house down! You see, growing up in a household with three sisters, a caring aunt, and a loving mother, I never had to step foot in the kitchen. But once I started living on my own with no female support, reality hit me in the face like a freight train. You can’t eat out or have takeouts every day because you’ll go broke before the sun sets. So, if you’re ever considering living alone, please make sure you teach yourself how to cook and make sure you get really good at it! Oh, and GOOD LUCK WITH THE DISHES.
So, there you have it, folks. If you think you have enough money to try life solo, chances are YOU’LL NEED MORE. If you think a life of solitude is sexy, IT IS BUT IT’S NOT. If you don’t know how to cook, DO NOT UNPACK because you won’t last a week. And, if you need any advice or guidance from a fellow loner, feel free NOT to reach out to me because you are on your own. 🙃